2010 Darwin awards are out

[$parechange]

2010 DARWIN AWARDS
>
>
>8th Place..... In Detroit , a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two
>feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate to
>retrieve his car keys.
>
>7th Place.... A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who "totally zoned when
>he ran", accidentally, jogged off a 100-foot high cliff on his daily run.
>
>6th Place ...While at the beach, Daniel Jones, 21, dug an 8 foot hole for protection
>from the wind and had been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom, when it collapsed,
>burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People on the beach used their hands and shovels
>trying to get him out but could not reach him. It took rescue workers using heavy
> equipment almost an hour to free him. Jones was pronounced dead at a hospital.
>
>
>5th Place... Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed as he fell through the ceiling
>of a bicycle shop he was robbing. Death was caused when the long flash light he
>had placed in his mouth to keep his hands free, rammed into the base of his skull
>as he hit the floor.
>
>4th Place.... Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed as he won a bet with
>friends who said he would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his
>mouth and pull the trigger.
>
>3rd Place.... After walking around a marked police patrol car parked at the
>front door, a man walked into Florida's H&J Leather &Firearms intent on
>robbing the store. The shop was full of customers and a uniformed officer was
>standing at the counter.. Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced
>a hold-up and fired a few wild shots from a target pistol. The officer and a clerk
>promptly returned fire and several customers also drew their guns and fired. The
>robber was pronounced dead at the scene by Paramedics. Crime scene investigators
>located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop. The subsequent autopsy revealed
>23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified rounds from 7 different weapons. No one
>else was hurt.
>
>HONORABLE MENTION... Paul Stiller, 47, and his wife Bonnie were bored just
>driving around at 2 a.m. So they lit a stick of dynamite to toss out the window
>to see what would happen. Apparently they failed to notice the window was closed!
>
>
>RUNNER UP... Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one
>of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from a local bridge in the
>middle of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and at least 10 men trooped
>along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 a.m. Upon arrival at the midpoint of the
>bridge they discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had
>continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable
>lay nearby. They secured one end around Bingham's leg and then tied the other
>(!) to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before the cable tightened and tore
>his foot off at the ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy water
>and was rescued by two nearby fishermen. Bingham's foot was never located.
>
>AND THE WINNER IS... Zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt (Paderborn , Germany) fed
>his constipated elephant 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of
>berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally got relief. Investigators
>say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive
>oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded. The sheer force of the elephant's
>unexpected defecation knocked Mr. Riesfeldt to the ground where he struck his
>head on a rock as the elephant continued to evacuate 200 pounds of dung on top
>of him. It seems to be just one of those freak accidents that proves.... '$h1t
> happens'.

[Lock5]

I'm loving the 3rd place one.