33 Reasons We Should Maybe Be Worried About The Direction Of Human Innovation
What are we even doing anymore, guys? Is this really how we want to spend our creative energies? posted on August 20, 2013 at 12:22pm EDT
1. Picnic pants

Picnic pants
Via huffingtonpost.com
Really? Really? You can’t just bring a blanket? You want to walk around with the picnic on your pants?
2. This banana case holder.


Um, bananas already come with a case it’s called a banana.
3. This diet water.

Diet. boinking. Water.
Chill out, diet culture. Just chill the f*ck out.
4. This penis-shaped lipstick.

No. Just no.
5. This baby butt fan.
infantbreeze.com
living.msn.com


Do they realize fans already exist? Also, you know, the air.
6. This potty-training device that comes with an iPad stand.

Because potty training needs to be even messier.
7. This “Daddle” for “horsing around.”


daddle.com / Via takemydough.com
Previously called your dad’s back.
8. Snapback fedoras.

Snapback fedoras.
Via dualchainz.tumblr.com
Because fedoars aren’t horrible enough.
9. Inflatable unicorn horns for cats.

Via sluttyoliveoil.tumblr.com
I think the cat will pass on this.

10. These fashionable “Morning Chicness bags.”

morningchicnessbags.com / Via parenting.com
Because even when women are barfing from morning sickness they have to look pretty.
11. This girlfriend lap pillow.

updatedhome.com / Via japantrendshop.com
This is just creepy.
12. This camel-toe guard.

cuchini.com
Um…
13. These shoes.

No. Just no.
14. This ramen fan.

pictovista.blogspot.com
Or, you know, just waiting a little bit for your food to cool like your mother taught you.
15. This pumpkin computer.

egberts.tumblr.com
There are real needs when it comes to computers. This is not one of them.
16. This “Kush support” thing that is supposed to help women sleep on their side “with proper breast support.”


Apparently even when women are sleeping their boobs have to be nice and perky.
17. This very literal take on hand soap.

amazon.com / Via egberts.tumblr.com
Which is apparently “musk scented” on purpose?!?!
18. Nutella shots.

sluttyoliveoil.tumblr.com
Just use a spoon for Pete’s sake.
19. This umbrella with a watergun handle.

Via trendhunter.com
Ok, this is a pretty cool concept design from Alex Wooley but, like, how about we fix f*cking umbrellas?!
20. These jean sandles

shine.yahoo.com / Via sluttyoliveoil.tumblr.com
Just use the fabric for something else. Please.
21. This screaming vase.

aliexpress.com / Via egberts.tumblr.com
How about not wasting $15 on something when you already own a pillow?
22. This world’s largest coffee cup.

amazon.com / Via egberts.tumblr.com
PUT THE COFFEE DOWN YOU’VE HAD ENOUGH.
23. This pair of “America Sunglasses”.

gizmodo.com / Via egberts.tumblr.com
They don’t even cover all of your eyes. WHY.
24. Any variation on this.


egberts.tumblr.com
Just use your creativity elsewhere.
25. The French fry holder.

Pretty sure this already exists and it’s called your cup holder.
26. “Shittens.”
buzzfeed.com


C’mon, y’all, toilet paper already exists, what even is this?
27. Burger paraphernalia.



egberts.tumblr.com
Evaluate your life choices.
28. These hand gloves called “Handerpants.”

handerpants.com / Via egberts.tumblr.com
Please just find a better use of fabric.
29. This lap desk for your steering wheel.
NO. THIS IS AN ACCIDENT WAITING TO HAPPEN WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU HUMANS?
30. These “Snuggle Wings.”

snugglewings.com /
A STRAITJACKET FOR YOUR BABY?!
31. These shoes that come with a built-in tent.

fastcoexist.com / Via Twitter: @MissZindzi
It’s OK. Just bring a backpack. It will be OK.
32. This human-hand dog leash.

alice-wang.com / Via outblush.com
Why, humans, why?
33. And, of course, Segways.

sluttyoliveoil.tumblr.com
NOPE. Innovate elsewhere.